And then, doctor, what can you tell me?
Mrs…look…
Your husband...
has pulmonary tuberculosis…
and I should tell that it is a very dangerous form.
Unfortunately, today, there is still not a cure for this desease.
I cannot do anything
I'm very sorry.
Sir, here it is.
Thanks.
I passed away at 0 6.00 o'clock in a Saturday morning,
after three days of desease.
My poor wife tied my hands and after she gave in tears.
I heard everything, but sounds seemed to come from very far away.
Only my left eye still perceived an unclear dim light.
My willpower was dead and any muscle reacted.
Only my thought hesitated. It was slow and confused but perfectly.
Or maybe it was the soul that lingered in that way before flying away.
After the weak light of my left eye went out too.
I didn't notice that someone closed my eyelids,
but when I became aware Ifelt like freezing,
even if I could still hear.
Other people arrived in that room,
how much time was passed?
At 11 o'clock?
Yes, it is at 11 o'clock
I heard in a confused way that my funeral had been fixed at 11.00 o'clock,
after...
I would have been buried.
Sir… Sir is everything good?
Yes, let you go away, please!
I have always been scared by the thought
to be buried more than the thought of the death.
My wife started dressing me like everyone usually does with dead bodies,
I still heard ungraceful and clunky noises
like of someone who carries inside a piece of furniture…
it was my coffin.
and after unknown hands lifted me
and put me down in the coffin.
Hey, what's happening?
No, nothing.
It seemed like if…
Nothing.
You can carry on, I'm sorry.
When two bangs of the hammer stuck the first spike
I felt like a shiver...in my bones
and other brutal and noisy bangs continued,
but, I don't know how, in a deep part of myself,
I felt I was crying
like I have never done before in my life.
Oh, after I heard priest's confused words and here we are!
They lowered me in the grave
and ropes stroke against corners of the coffin…
It was the end!
After there was a terrible blow
and I thought that my coffin was divided in two parts;
Oh my God, it was like if I was unconscious,
I didn't exist anymore.
Instead little by little I regained consciousness disoriented.
I missed the air and I was cold;
I wanted to stand up jumping
but I hit strongly my head
and I faced the horrible truth…
I was buried alive
I started struggling
and scratching the wood with my nails,
out of me because of terror,
arching my body with all my energies and on my feet, on my kidneys,
beating my elbows, my knees
and throwing kicks to break my bones.
I shouted, shouted like a crazy man
with a voice which seemed not be mine.
After it seemed that the coffin was collapsing from the side of my feet,
and then I hit my heels
with vigour hoping from that side there was a grave done recently.
My feet suddently went under in an empty space
and I had only to pass a thin layer of soil
and I slithered in a still opened grave…
Oh my God,
I was alive.
I remained to wheeze on my back to stare at stars,
with my empty head,
I don't know how long time had passed.
I could run
I could run and hug again my wife and my sons but…
I noticed I didn't desire it
and it is strange from that moment,
but I don't desire it anymore.
I replaced the soil at its place in order
they didn't notice anything
and I went away like a ghost
without some one knowing it.
How much can a man change after his death?
Can I still be a man?
I wonder for all my life,
waiting the death...
came back to find me.
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