We all have somebody that we wish we could reach, that we wish they would just accept
the help, that they would help themselves or take our help and just see the truth.
And we see the good in them, we see the potential in them that
they're squandering away, and it's the saddest thing in the world
because there's nothing you can do. You can only sit there and watch it happen.
And it's the most painful thing in the entire world. And there's nothing wrong
with seeing the good in them, even when other people might say,
you know, they're such and such, they're bad, they're crazy,
or whatever, you just give up hope. It's really, really hard if not impossible
to do that because you have seen the good. Maybe they haven't, right?
And we don't want to give up on them. Now, here is the key thing that is so hard
to really internalize. You don't have to give up on someone and
giving up on someone does not mean that you're going to
distance yourself, okay? You can distance yourself without giving
up on someone. You don't have to be a part of the toxic cycle. If it's a
relationship, if it's a friend or family member, or whatever it is, you don't have
to be a part of the cycle and you don't have to give up on them.
Those can happen in tangent. It doesn't mean that just because you're
not going to be in the vicious toxic cycle anymore and you're not going to be target
and you're not going to, you know, have your energy leeched off of
and things like that that you're giving up. You can still have hope,
you can still have faith, and you can still love and care
about the person. It's not one and the same of distancing yourself and giving up.
And I think that's the thing that our brains tend to trick us into doing is
well, if I don't feed the cycle anymore, you know, if I don't continue this, then
I'm giving up, and that's not true. You don't have to give up hope,
you don't have to give up faith, but don't let yourself be brought down
because you care so much about someone that really, really has not yet come to
the point where they can receive help properly, and have not yet come to the
point where they can see that good in themselves and let it come out.
Because remember their entire lives, you know, 20 years really
is nothing, right? But to us it could be extreme pain and a long,
long time obviously. But it could take 20 years for some
people, it could take two days, it could take two years.
You know, you never really know, but it could take time for some people and
in many cases, it will. And that's their journey, that's their process,
and you can never force anyone to accept your help. You can never force anyone to
change. They have to decide that for themselves. And it is the most painful
thing in the world to see someone you care about just destroying themselves and
refusing to accept that help. But you are allowed to get out of that
toxic cycle, and it doesn't mean you have to give up hope or faith,
and they may come around eventually. But don't hurt yourself and ruin yourself
in the process.
♪ [music] ♪
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