USA news on Youtube Mar 21 2018

[upbeat music]

Welcome everybody.

Thank you for spending a Friday night at Biola University

and you are in for a treat.

This has never happened before in history.

You are witnessing it here and now.

This is a very big moment

and you are very privileged to be here.

We are gonna have a wonderful night together

and we are going to talk about some really great issues

that are pertaining to our lives

and also to the lives of the youth.

We are gonna not waste much time at all.

We're gonna get started.

I want to introduce to you our panel.

We will go through a series of about four questions

and with the questions if other things come up,

depending on the time,

we might open up for questions at the end,

or that we can meet with them privately.

We also want to welcome all those

that are watching by Instagram

and we will also be accepting any questions that you have

coming in via like email or anything like that.

We just want to begin to enlighten our world

and we want to share what God has done in our lives.

This really doesn't need a whole lot of intro.

I'm gonna let them tell you who they are

and we will go in order.

We will get started.

So the first question that we are going to ask this panel

and when you're asked your first question

or when you answer it you can give them your name.

What we want to know is we want you to tell us a little bit

of your childhood and what it was like growing up,

what was your family life like, did you have siblings,

were your parents together, did you go to church,

those kind of things.

I'm Aubree Munro.

I am a catcher, I played at the University of Florida

and now I play for Team USA.

Growing up I was in church.

But my parents got divorced when I was four years old.

My mom kept taking us to church even though she wasn't

she wasn't feeling great with God at the time,

but it was important.

So I was always knew there was a God,

I had faith but it wasn't really personal yet.

Then going through travel ball recruiting,

I wasn't in church very often.

We kind of went on holidays and whenever we could,

in fact we didn't go so much that every time I would show up

they thought I was new and wanted to invite me to sign

a welcome card and I'm like no I've been here before

like five times.

So I knew there was a God and I was faith-based,

but I feel like I grew up with a lot of my decision making

was more morally based but not as faith-based as I

later grew to become in college.

I'm Leah Amico.

I played at the University of Arizona a long time ago.

I also played for Team USA for in three Olympics.

I was on the team for 10 years before I retired.

I, as a little girl, went to church when I was probably

four or five years old.

We went a few times, went on holidays,

and then as I got a little bit older, our family moved.

We didn't really get plugged into a church.

My parents had actually kind of had a falling out.

They had been kind of hurt by some people in the church

and instead of finding a different church then

that maybe God was moving them,

we just kind of stopped going.

Not too long after that we started, I was the first child,

so we started getting into sports

which took up a lot of our weekends,

eventually travel ball, that's where we were every Sunday,

right at the softball fields.

It just was not a part of our lives,

so again we would go maybe on a holiday Easter or something.

I knew enough to know that Jesus had died for my sins.

I knew enough that if you place your trust in Him,

you'd go to Heaven,

but I kind of always just took it as that prayer

was my ticket.

I didn't have anything deeper.

I didn't know the Bible taught you will bear fruit,

and the Holy Spirit comes and dwells in you.

I didn't know the word of God which really is,

so important to know if we have a relationship.

We're gonna know God's word.

It wasn't for me until college.

My parents went through some rocky times as I got into

high school and eventually ended up divorcing.

Kind of went through that stuff as well before

going to college which is really when the transition

kind of happened for me.

My name is Jake Reed.

I went to the University of Oregon.

Now I am currently with the Minnesota Twins.

I got drafted in 2014 and I've been with them since.

I grew up in San Diego.

Didn't grow up in the church.

Grew up in somewhat of a broken home.

My dad struggled with alcohol and you know,

I really kind of lacked that male leadership

in my life growing up.

We'd go to church every now and then on holidays

but by no means was it consistent.

Never had a relationship with Him.

That really showed in my decision-making.

I live my life prior to being a Christian

the way that I wanted to live it,

and doing the things that I wanted to do.

The things that I thought I could do because of who I was

and I was just motivated by my selfish desires,

not having a relationship with Christ

and not having that leadership in my life at an early age

really kind of affected the way that I grew up.

You know, had to deal with my consequences because of it.

I'm Nikki Udria.

I went to the University of Oregon.

I played shortstop there and now I just made the Team USA.

I'm also an assistant coach here at Biola.

I grew up in, I'm the oldest of three.

I have a younger brother, he's 20,

and a younger sister, she's 13.

I did not grow up going to church on a regular basis.

We would go to church on holidays.

Mostly Christmas, Easter, you know,

those ones that everyone goes to.

But I grew up in a Catholic household.

My parents were both raised Catholic.

So they decided to raise their children Catholic,

but I did my first communion,

went to Catholic high school but in no means did I have

a personal relationship with God.

I knew who God was and I knew He could do all these

great things and people who believe in God

seem to have this great life.

God and I's relationship was more so when I needed things

or when I wanted thing to go my way.

It was kind of a selfish,

just one-way relationship.

It was me coming to God when I needed things

and I didn't start to have that one-on-one personal

routine or relationship with God until my mom got sick

when I was in high school.

So that's when I kind of started seeking God

and turning to God for my life instead of just

occasional things that I wanted.

Hi, I'm Jennie Finch Daigle.

I grew up in actually La Mirada, California.

I grew up in the church.

My grandparents, my grandmother I would say,

was my prayer warrior.

I just remember every morning being with them

and seeing my grandparents over the kitchen table

doing their daily devotionals.

Just so thankful for that root and upbringing of that

and just seeing their faith being lived out.

I have two older brothers.

They were really really active in the church.

Both on the worship teams, played guitar.

I was kind of the young jock and played softball

and that kind of steered us away from church.

I remember our church had a drive-in service

so quite often I'd be in our car in my uniform,

and we'd take off before or as the sermon ended

and the last song was closed we'd be on our way to games.

Then it just kind of got really hard to balance.

Sorry I'm battling this cough.

Really hard to balance for us in our family,

because it's like hey God, we feel like this is a gift,

you gave me this talent but it was so hard

to feel plugged in and I would go to midweek

but I still just never,

I mean they would go on retreats and I just never felt like

those were like my brothers and sisters.

Luckily I was so blessed to have a strong sisterhood

of believers in high school.

Not today Satan.

[crowd laughs]

[coughing]

Notice that till it was my time, right?

[coughs]

I have a water in my purse.

You can come back to me.

Okay.

Alright, we'll go onto the next one.

So the next question would be,

we want to know all the way

to through your high school years,

don't go into college yet,

but we want to know about the recruiting years.

And what your mentality was, what was it like,

why you chose your University

and if there was prior to that,

if that was where your conversion was or whatever happened,

just lead us through that up until college.

So like I said my parents were divorced

so I'm very very close with my mom and my grandpa.

He was a huge role in just softball in my family.

We were like the softball family of Brea.

Everyone in my family felt like played,

and so softball was really big to us.

I started playing travel ball,

just wanted to get going away from rec ball.

That started my child wild journey.

Played for my parents,

it was pretty relaxed.

And then I got to the point where I was like okay,

I want to be more competitive.

So I started getting in another travel ball teams,

and then again in couple years later,

I was a freshman in high school and I'm like okay,

I feel like I'm plateauing, I'm not getting better.

And this whole time not really in church.

Not really being fed, not in community.

Just had a sense of faith but wasn't feeding it at all.

Going into my sophomore year,

I went to a bunch of tryouts that summer.

My first tryout I went to, I threw up.

I was out of shape, it was terrible.

I remember crying with my mom like, oh my gosh,

I'm never gonna find a new team,

I'm gonna have to go crawling back to my old team

and this is terrible.

Like my mom always does, she says let's get a plan.

I practiced really hard for a couple weeks,

and then I went to another tryout.

Did great, they said sorry we have catchers already.

You're great but sorry.

Okay, go to another tryout.

Same thing, just sorry we really like you

but we already have too many catchers.

So I'm like okay, so I go to my last tryout,

and I'm just, all right I'm just gonna go for it.

I was completely myself for the first time

in a new situation.

I'm usually really hesitant and kind of have to dip my toe

before I really show myself.

I go to this tryout and I was so myself,

and at the end the he goes,

the head coach is like hey we'd like you to stick around

for the meeting but what are you doing here?

My mom and I look at each other like,

what are you talking about, we're here for the tryout.

And he's like, we don't have open tryouts.

This was a practice.

I'm like, oh, mortified, absolutely mortified.

It was horrible.

But they ended up keeping me like a stray dog.

It was the greatest thing that ever happened to me

for my career because that team taught me so many things

about just how to play the game the right way,

and just set me on my path to Florida,

where my relationship really really grew.

But it was the first time in my life where I had this aha

moment of like, how did all that happen?

What just made all of that work?

All these other teams liked me but didn't need me.

This last tryout was like my last option

and I was totally able to be myself and so many things

that were uncharacteristic

or just felt like they were the wrong,

like door after door being closed on me.

Then this random me crashing your practice,

and they keep me and it's one of the greatest things

that ever happened to me, like, how does that work?

So it was my first moment of,

okay something made this happen.

There's a big plan here.

Then going through recruiting,

I was choosing between Alabama and Florida.

I went to visits to both schools.

I loved both of them.

Coaches were great at both, facilities were great,

teams, like the players were great.

I was up late after my visit to Florida

and there's a replay game on

and it's Florida versus Alabama.

I'm like, okay, I'll watch this,

maybe this will help me decide.

And coach Walton lost his mind on an umpire, just berserk.

He was so just mad, I think he was pounding on the plate.

I don't know what happened.

I couldn't remember what happened in the actual game

but that was my big clarifying moment of okay,

I want to play for that guy.

Which seems insane but to me, it was loyalty

and I was just like wow.

I want to play for him, I want to play for someone

who's gonna go to bat for his team like that.

And again just this,

why would that tell me to go to Florida?

That seems nuts, like, a girl just wants to go play

for a coach that lost his mind on an umpire,

I don't think so.

But that moment of clarity, those moments that,

my mom has always said,

my father taught me to trust my gut,

and the church taught me that

my gut is the Holy Spirit's leading.

And so that was one of my first,

just gut feelings of my life,

that ended up again,

being part of my story that just kept leading me

and leading me to exactly where I was supposed to be.

So I ended up choosing Florida.

I called coach Walton the next day,

said I wanted to be a Gator.

That started my journey to eventually

surrendering my life to Christ.

I grew up in a much different time.

It's going way back.

Lot less opportunities but also I really didn't have to go

to all these tryouts.

[laughs]

So it's changed a lot now.

For me we were clueless.

I loved soccer and softball probably the same.

I mean I loved both sports

and was very successful in both sports.

By the time I was hitting high school,

kind of my freshman year,

it kind of became clear,

I'd won my first sports internationals,

I was a pitcher back then.

Back before they had all the different organizations,

it was kind of mainly one.

And we took first place and it kind of opened my eyes,

like okay, I want to get that college scholarship.

I had these coaches and my parents and people saying,

you could earn a scholarship if you work hard

in the classroom and on the field.

So that became my goal.

Softball was not on the TV like it is these days,

so I didn't have like that school that I saw

or thought about.

Recruiting was much later.

Obviously nowadays you could be 11 and committing.

But it was a lot different back then.

You actually decided your senior year in high school

which was still hard at that time believe it or not,

to make that decision.

So for me,

I just kept playing travel ball, we won when I was 16

internationals as well.

And I think that was the recruiting.

It was a lot later back then.

Coaches are going to be watching and we were coming up

against the very stacked Batbuster team

way back in the day.

They were that good back then as well.

All the college coaches kind of came to watch this team.

I mean, every one of those girls went to top tier colleges,

but here we were, our team necessarily didn't measure up

on paper as hot as they were,

but we jelled and we still had a good,

a good center piece of our team and we ended up winning

nationals and I think shocking a lot of coaches of like,

okay, wait, who's that kid, and who's that kid right there?

So that's where I kind of got noticed,

as a hitter, a pitcher.

But I still laugh 'cause even way back when,

they would have these girls and they'd be like,

I got like 15 letters, and I'm like,

I have like three people that want me.

Florida State, that seemed really far away.

I grew up here in Southern California.

Arizona was one of 'em, Long Beach State,

I had a bunch of friends that were gonna

go to Long Beach State.

So I took a trip to Arizona.

They had just won their first ever national championship

when I went there.

I just fell in love with the school.

Kinda like you said like, there was just something.

I went on my next trip and it wasn't the same.

For whatever reason there's something in your heart,

I believe now, not knowing at the time but I believe God

was kinda directing me in that even before I knew,

kind of what He had for me.

So for me after having that experience and taking

that second trip, I never even took the third, I just said,

okay this is where I'm gonna go.

For me I grew up playing football and baseball

and basketball.

When I was a kid and took that into high school,

and the same thing, played football first,

and then basketball and then baseball season

would roll around.

I was never really too focused on one or the other.

I love football and I love baseball.

I wasn't very good at basketball but I like playing it,

and I played it my whole life.

So I just continued playing those when I got to high school.

Then around my junior year,

I had gotten hurt a couple time in football,

I was a quarterback.

I hurt my knee really bad.

I missed a couple weeks and came back

and then I broke my foot.

By this time I wasn't really getting recruited too heavily

in baseball, and not too heavily for football either,

and it was kind of a scary time for me,

because those injuries, had they been worse,

I don't know what would've happened.

I don't know if I would've gotten any offers,

I would've missed that baseball season.

Things could have been really different but luckily

they weren't too bad.

My junior baseball season went great.

I decided not to play football my senior year

because of those injuries.

I decided to commit that summer to baseball.

Had a good summer but I really wasn't getting,

at that time you could get emails from coaches.

You couldn't get calls or anything,

they couldn't talk to you yet.

I wasn't really getting any emails and I was wondering

what's going on?

I thought I was having a good summer.

And apparently like the email I was handing out,

or sending back and these letters to colleges

was an email that I didn't really use much.

So one day I just randomly decided to check this email

and I checked it and it just school after school

after school just expressing interest in me.

For whatever reason Oregon really caught my attention.

The head coach at the time,

I started emailing him back and forth

and he was pretty close in my area so he came down

like within the day and met with me and my family.

Just a great man and we put a lot of trust in him,

and he deserved it, he was a really great man.

We could sense that in him right away.

Within probably two weeks of me checking my email

and stuff and seeing that interest from Oregon,

I committed without really even visiting.

I wanted to get away.

I could've gone to San Diego State or USD,

I kind of wanted to get away

and have that college experience

and get away from mom and dad,

playing at big conference like the Pac-12.

You know like you said, kind of looking back now,

seeing kind of God's fingerprints all over those decisions

you're making you know, and going to Oregon

and meeting my wife my freshman year.

Those decisions that you don't know at the time,

but looking back now are just things that you're so

happy about that you made those decisions.

And so happy to see where God was working in your life,

before you even knew Him.

It ended up being the greatest decision I've ever made.

Met my wife, met the woman who led me to Christ,

and it was just incredible.

That's awesome.

Like I said, I grew up in a Catholic household,

not really going to church and stuff.

I danced for awhile until I was about nine years old

and then I started playing softball.

And then I ended up,

my dad, let me start there.

I played softball not because I liked it,

not because I was good at it when I first started

but because my dad was like, this is what you're gonna do.

It was miserable to be honest.

I was like tall and really skinny and not into my body

and just dorky, to put it out there.

But my dad always believed in me and so one weekend,

he took me out to all these different tryouts,

I think it was Batbusters, and Corona Angels,

maybe one more.

I ended up making the Corona Angels team

and ended up on Corona Angels.

Well, I was still playing and it was miserable,

the car rides, I hated having to wake up early

and then games where I would play bad,

those car rides were miserable.

I did not like softball.

It was something that I did for everyone around me.

Marty Tyson was my coach when I was in 14 and under

all the way up and for some reason there was just something

that he saw in me that I didn't see myself,

but everyone around me saw.

It was so hard to you know, stick out those days

where in the car I'm literally crying and not because of

the things my dad said all the time or because of the way

I played because I did not enjoy it.

But I was good at it and people saw something in me

that I didn't see myself and so they kept telling me

all these things that I could do

or things that I could achieve, you can be this,

you can be an All-American, you could be a great shortstop.

I did not even play shortstop until,

I played third base my freshman year of high school

and then I played shortstop once,

the shortstop left but I was playing shortstop

and they just kept instilling in me all these expectations

where at the time they were a burden to me.

There was just something that I never in my life thought

I could achieve and so I had so much pressure on me

going through my high school years.

One day my mom sat me down and she told me

that she was diagnosed with breast cancer.

For one moment in my life I was like, wow,

this is not about me.

I've been so concerned about what I want to do

or what softball is doing, we're so busy with softball.

It was turned upside down.

I ended up being recruited by a bunch of different schools

and like Aubree said, at that time,

you don't really know where you want to go.

All these teams are reaching out, you have no clue.

It'd be nice to go here but you could also go there.

I ended up committing my sophomore year of high school

and this was before my mom was even sick.

I wanted to go somewhere far away from home,

but not too far, I didn't want to go like

another side of the country or anything.

But I also wanted to be pretty far away

where they couldn't just drive.

It's a 13-hour drive, and like a two hour flight.

I was pretty far away, so that was good for me,

but I had been looking at Washington and I had been

really going back and forth between Washington and Oregon.

Something fell through with Washington.

Something with the scholarship

and so I took my visit to Oregon and I fell in love.

My recruiting process was kind of different

because the coaches were so,

a lot of assistant coaches left and new ones came in

so I didn't have that relationship with my coaches before

I got there but I just knew as soon as I stepped on campus

that that was where I was supposed to be,

like Jake and Leah have touched on a little bit.

It's just crazy how you don't know

God's working in your life before

you even have that relationship with Him.

The things that I would've come in contact with

and the people that I would meet at Oregon to

just instill some of the values and the relationships

and ultimately my relationship with God that I have now.

Going there,

was the best decision of my life,

so yeah, I went to University of Oregon.

So sorry about that earlier.

So going back real quick just on that,

so in high school it was really easy.

It was easy because I was surrounded by

accountability sisters.

My two best friend twins, their dad was a pastor,

so it was always around us, we were always praying,

wherever we go, like God was with us.

And then went to college and it was like,

well I had my first boyfriend my senior year

and kind of steered away a little bit.

Kind of tampered out there and then went to college

and it was like, whoa, like away from mom and dad,

I didn't have my sisters next to me.

So it was a whole different ball game.

There was only one other,

there's believers but then there was only like one

other I guess firm inner faith teammate of mine.

Just kind of felt out with that and then I don't know,

this might be later I'm answering this.

And then junior year, let's talk about it later.

And then after that kind of just seeing

what was out in the world,

getting a lot of experiences, opportunities,

seeing you know supposedly successful

and the best of the best and yet being so empty.

And everywhere around is like, everyone is hurting so bad,

and I was like, wait a minute, this is success.

This is you know, being famous, this is being rich,

this is everything that the world tells you is successful

but yet everybody is so broken

and everyone is in so much pain

and searching for that something.

It was like okay God, thank you,

thank you for showing me this and showing it to me

so clearly and so evidently.

Then got married, had kids,

competed in '04 and '08 Olympics.

Went to University of Arizona, followed Leah there.

Back to my recruiting days,

played in Southern California,

my freshman year I remember my first letter was from UCLA

and I was so pumped.

Getting a letter from UCLA and they're interested

and it was like, oh my gosh, all this hard work,

all this sacrifice,

all these things that don't often make sense

to people around me, like this is paying off.

People are seeing and I do have the opportunity to live out

my goal playing college softball.

I ended up taking two trips.

I was not a fan of leaving home at all.

It was like wait I have to go on a trip by myself

to go visit college?

No thank you I don't want to go, mom and dad you can't go?

I took two trips, Washington and Arizona.

I went to Washington and I remember calling my mom

first night and I was like, mom, there are so many guys

that are so much taller than me.

Like that was like made my whole trip.

Oh my gosh there is big people out there.

Being around the volleyball girls,

and the basketball players, like, I'm not even tall!

I am short, like this is the greatest thing ever!

Sign me up for college now.

Good food, all the best of the best of course recruiting.

It's like wine and dine, right?

I would just say, mom, I want to come here.

I think I wanna come here mom and dad,

and they're like, get home, go to Arizona and then decide.

So came home, went to Arizona, and I just knew.

I played travel ball and there was four girls

a year older than me.

They were all freshman.

I guess going there as well, they weren't there yet.

I knew, I just had that sense of home,

like they were saying up here on the panel,

I knew this was the place for me.

Coach Candrea who coaches there,

just like a second father figure to have away from home.

I love the tradition, the sense of community,

and it was more than just softball

and I think that's stuck out the most to me.

Just how much he cared about us as his people

and our family and such, so went to Arizona.

Okay so let's go into our college years.

What we'd like to know is your college experience

and where was God in this?

You could just take us through that a little bit.

You don't have to bring us to present day,

but at least get us through college

and where was God at in it?

Kind of like Jennie, I didn't originally want to go away.

I wanted to stay close.

And then my sister came home from school in South Carolina

was like holy cow there's a whole other world out there.

So I was like, okay.

I ended up in Florida, all the way on the other side.

I didn't think I would get that homesick but I did.

I had so many expectations for myself.

I wanted to come in, I wanted to be an impact player,

I wanted to be this, I wanted to be that,

I wanted to make like noise when I got there.

I didn't, I really didn't.

I struggled and my freshman year,

my first weekend as a Gator,

I had more passed balls in that one weekend

than I had in the whole three years before.

For me that was devastating.

That was the first time that I,

like my eyes were so opened to the fact that so much of my

identity was wrapped up in my performance,

because if I didn't have a good day at the field,

it was a bad day.

I wasn't good enough.

I struggled with that a lot freshman year.

Just that identity and kind of just feeling like,

I have to try harder, I have to better,

I have to constantly change to fit what's expected of me.

Really, it was just expectations that I had for myself

and I wasn't meeting them.

I finally just got so frustrated one day my freshman year,

I remember I had gone in to hit on the off day,

mostly I think just so I could tell coach that I hit

on the off day.

I didn't feel like I was productive.

I didn't feel like my heart was in it

'cause I was just so frustrated.

I remember walking back to the locker room,

almost in tears.

Just like, I'm over it, God it's up to you.

Please, help me, because I've been trying to do this

by myself and it's not working.

That was my first moment of,

surrender, of just I can't do it on my own.

I can't do it, it's not working.

I want to try it your way.

I got involved with Athletes in Action,

which is similar to FCA.

It's just kind of what we have at UF.

Got plugged in, I started meeting people.

Our Athletes in Action leader talked a lot about identity

and I was like, okay that's me.

This is my problem,

I feel like I am softball.

And I never really felt like that before in high school.

I felt like I was Aubree and I played softball,

but now I felt like,

all I had was softball and it wasn't going well.

I finally started to see just with that surrender

and with seeking something greater than myself,

and seeking something bigger,

I was able to, if I had a bad day, chalk it up to a bad day,

because guess what, Aubree?

You're more than softball.

So that was a really big moment in time of my life

of just learning to surrender

and learning that there's so much more

than just catching the ball, hitting a ball.

These things that seem so important especially at UF,

and the time that I was at UF,

it felt like your whole world was softball

and trying to get to the World Series.

Everyone who knows me in Gainesville,

knows me as Aubree, the catcher.

Being able to take a step back from that,

so my freshman year it was a lot of growth.

I mean I still struggled even after that moment,

I just struggled offensively

and then I wouldn't be in the game

and I was just frustrated and my mom would call me,

and I'd be crying and she'd say,

well do you want to transfer?

And I'd be like, hmm, no.

There was something, I mean I thought about it,

I really did, I was like,

okay maybe I'm not cut out for this,

maybe I need to drop down a level,

maybe I'm just not built for SCC softball.

I thought about it and every time she would ask me,

honestly ask me, there was this thought of like,

no, you're supposed to be here, you belong here.

There's something here for you.

I didn't know it at the time, I thought it was,

again, just a hunch, a gut feeling, whatever.

But that's God's voice,

that was the Holy Spirit speaking to me

of no there's more for you here.

I came back with a sense of ownership.

I came back with a sense of purpose.

Not only for my game but for my life.

For my sophomore year we ended up winning the World Series

in '14, and then that was my biggest goal up to that point.

Softball wasn't back in the Olympics.

Team USA wasn't on my radar.

And we won and I woke up the next day,

it felt, it was great, like yeah, we won.

It's kind of like a dream-like,

did that really happen feeling and then,

you get dressed, you go about your day,

and you show up the next year and you're gonna have to do it

all over again.

Especially doing it as a sophomore,

and I still have two more years of college,

and I had this sense of like,

it's really hard to do that.

Does this mean that my next two years are a waste?

Does this mean that, like how are we suppose to,

what do we do from here?

So I had this sense of extreme high and success

and I just reached my ultimate goal at the time,

and what now?

So I had this just weird feeling and then we go into 2015,

and we win again.

So it's like, wow, okay, look we just made history.

First SCC school to do it.

And still this what now feeling of,

why, like, we worked so hard for this for this one moment

and then it's over.

I mean I wouldn't trade those moments for anything,

but it didn't fulfill me, it didn't fulfill me long enough.

It didn't fulfill me beyond like a day,

'cause then all of a sudden it's,

I gotta show up in the Fall,

I still have to get up at 6:00 a.m.,

I still have to get my butt kicked.

I still have to do all these things that I've done

the last three years.

Then my senior year,

we're number one all year and it's so great

and we're on track to go to the World Series,

maybe win a third.

And then we lose in a walk-off home run on my home field,

in Super Regionals.

The sense of, like the old me,

would have felt like such a failure.

If I was still rooted in like,

me, Aubree the softball player,

it would've been wow, you're a failure.

My career was more than I could ever dreamt it could be.

And because we didn't go to World Series my senior year,

I'm gonna think I'm a failure?

Like that's ridiculous but that's how

this world wants us to think.

Especially in sport, especially in baseball and softball

which are such games of failure.

Going through my senior year,

I feel like my senior year was the first year

I was able to play with real freedom.

Because my senior year I was really really

actively pursuing God.

It was the first time in my life that I was more purposeful.

I was trying to be a light through

everything that I was doing.

A light to my team, and I got baptized May 9th, 2016.

It was my senior weekend so my whole family was there.

We had just won the SCC.

So all my teammates were going out to celebrate.

You know, celebrate.

And I was getting baptized the next day.

I texted my teammates.

They're all pre-gaming, getting ready to go out,

and I'm like, hey guys, wanted to invite you,

but I'm getting baptized in my apartment complex pool.

If you guys want to come, that'd be cool,

but like no pressure.

I didn't want to be pressuring them to come.

I expected nothing 'cause they're gonna be out,

they're gonna be having a good time.

They're probably not gonna want to get up on the off day,

and coming out for 15, 20 minutes and watch me get baptized.

Immediately I got a text from one of my teammates,

hey I want to be there, what time?

I was like, oh wow, and I was so touched by that.

And then the next morning,

I think we had, we had 17 people in the team that year, 18,

like 14 of them, 14, 15 of them showed up.

It was like, oh my gosh, and they're all like,

I mean some of them are crying when I'm being baptized.

It was just such this moment of like,

one, I felt so loved.

In the biggest moment of my life,

they showed up for me.

And then on the back end of it,

I may have just planted a seed for them.

Something that's just maybe stirred in their hearts,

I might not see the fruition of it when I'm on the team,

I might not see it later,

but something, like some part of them got them to wake up

on the off day after who knows, what the night before,

and come and witness that and be a part of that

to either support me or maybe God was stirring in them.

So that was such a huge moment for me,

not only because I got baptized and that was amazing.

It was kind of just this example of me,

'cause I'm not usually very bold.

I've been actually working on being bolder in my faith.

It felt like such a leap of faith just to text them

and invite them.

So it was such a,

God's so faithful.

Showing me kind of almost rewarding that to encourage me,

to continue to be bold, and to continue to be a light,

and to plant seeds.

Then my senior year, we lost and it was over,

and I was sad but I was at such a place in my faith

at that point that I wasn't defined by any of it.

I was just so grateful for the opportunity

and grateful for the platform,

and grateful for the times that I had in that uniform

and ultimately who I became.

I felt this such an intense sense of peace

in knowing that I became exactly who I was supposed

to become through my experiences at Florida,

and I owe that completely to my growth in Christ.

So I played at Arizona.

Was a pitcher, first baseman,

usually hitting the top, three at a lineup,

got to Arizona and you're like, whoa,

these girls really know how to play.

I'm not that big fish anymore.

I was a pitcher so I'm pitching against at the time,

Arizona was maybe the Florida's or the Oklahoma's of today.

We won three national championships out of my four years.

I'm pitching in practice as this freshman to--

Did you guys just hear that?

Three national championships out of her four years, just,

by the way. No big deal.

So I'm pitching to like the best home run hitters

in the nation.

In fact, Laura Espinoza, her senior year,

hit 37 home runs her senior year.

So I'm pitching against her and I throw this little,

outside screwball, and she just I mean crushes it.

Crushes it so far, like, and I just,

later that night, you know getting tears in my eyes,

hi mom, like, I'm horrible.

I don't know what I'm doing here.

My boyfriend's back in high school, you know,

luckily eventually he cheated on me

because we needed to dump him anyways.

[crowd laughs]

He pretty much dumped me but it was good, it was good.

[laughing]

So you know you go through those times.

I think every freshman, you have that,

you're like trying to find your place.

You're thinking, do I fit in, am I really good enough.

I never felt good enough.

No matter what, I never felt, even the USA Team,

all those experiences, it still always felt like,

I could be so much better.

I had that year, eventually found my spot in the lineup.

I pitched a little bit, we had another pitcher.

I kind of eventually found my spot in the lineup

as the designated hitter.

Kind of finished out the season.

Now we ended up winning that national championship

and I thought, okay this is going way back.

So they tape-delayed the championship game.

That's like the only game they're gonna play.

There may be a couple throughout the season,

but the championship game is tape-delayed.

We ended up winning and beating UCLA.

I just thought oh my goodness, this is the very thing ever.

People get to see us on TV.

We just won, it's gonna be an awesome summer.

Next year I went back and they moved me to outfield

and they said hey, you know, we have other pitchers,

you go to the outfield now.

I enjoyed that, that kind of found me this new spot

which eventually would lead me to the Olympic team.

One again, my sophomore year, so things are going well,

school is going well.

Again identity, like you're talking about.

When you do well in what you're doing,

you like having that identity.

It's when things aren't going well, you're like,

wait a second, wait a second.

This doesn't feel good, who am I, really?

That's when we start to question.

My junior year, I had a teammate,

who just came on this team as a little freshman,

we're back to back national champions,

and this girl comes in,

I'll tell you what,

when somebody is on fire for Jesus Christ,

when they know who God says they are,

when the word is their strength and their foundation,

there is something that is different.

No matter what.

It's not just that person that says I believe in God,

which was me.

It's that person that just knows it.

And they live it and they don't need to fit in.

I think that's the biggest thing.

I came in as a freshman and you're thinking,

well I'm not as pretty as her, I'm not as smart as them,

I don't have as much money as them,

you find all the things that we're trying to compare.

Like Jennie was kind of talking about,

success ladder, right?

This girl just knew who she was in Christ.

She had a heart because when you know who God says you are,

you want other people to know who God says they are,

because most people don't know that.

So that was her heart and so she invited some of us

to a bible study.

She built relationships, she was an example

by how she talked and how she acted.

That meant when everybody's going out partying,

all those Christians over there,

she wasn't doing what everybody was saying.

But was she the first one that would say,

when somebody's life was falling apart,

she would be the one to pray for them.

She had relationship with everybody.

She was genuine and you guys, at the heart of it,

it's the love of Christ.

That's it, when we love Him,

and we know how much He loves us,

we can love other people better.

And that flows through our sport,

like you're hearing us say and everything.

So she invited me to bible study.

I went to this bible study.

I remember that day, I don't have a great memory

but God always lets you remember what you need to remember.

She said, hey you guys wanna come?

A few people said they would come.

And this is the thing, sometimes I forget.

At this age, just the maybe the invite is gonna change

somebody's life 'cause God had something for them

wherever I was inviting them to come to church one night.

So she invites me, I remember being tired and thinking,

ugh, I have so many things to do,

but I told Julie I would go.

That was the only thing that kept me there was my word.

And I walked into that room

and there was an Athletes in Action like you said,

we had Athletes in Action on our school.

It was him the leader, a track athlete, Julie my teammate,

and myself, four of us.

They opened the Bible and I was like, oh my goodness,

what are they even talking about?

I don't know the Bible, I don't know anything they're saying

so I was like, okay, just don't ask me any questions, okay?

And they sat and talked about the word of God.

And you guys I don't know,

I just know it sounded like a foreign language to me,

and that was all it took for God to open my eyes,

to say I know Him, I believe Jesus died on the cross.

But there must be more to this.

And that was it.

That day, in my heart, I made this decision

walking out of the room,

you know what God, I really do want to know you.

I want to follow you and eventually I've learned that

that the Bible says that, Jesus said, come on,

and they're like, He says, come follow me.

It's followers, it's believers,

it's not just those who believe in God.

That began this transformation of learning on the field,

like you talked about, when I play, how do you play for God?

What does the Bible even teach?

I don't even know what the Bible teaches.

Oh, why shouldn't we go out and party?

The Bible says don't get drunk on wine

but be filled with the Spirit.

I mean all these things but I wanted it.

He's not gonna force it on anybody.

You got it want it and if you want it,

He's gonna give it to you.

God is so good.

He is so good and I saw the example in action,

and then I wanted that.

And then my heart became Lord may I be that example.

I'll quickly finish this up.

I took a year off my senior year to go to the Olympics,

came back, had my senior year finished up,

won my third national championship.

Again, I'm growing, I'm growing in Christ,

Julie is basically my mentor, my teammate, my sister,

leading me even though she's two years younger than me.

We win, thing are awesome and I get a phone call

that Julie had passed away.

She was 21 years old, she had been sick.

One night she went to sleep and she woke up in Heaven,

face to face with her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

In that moment as I opened my Bible,

it was tears and crying and not understanding why.

Why God would you take her, why, Lord?

And thanking Him for the time He gave me with her

and what she showed me.

My Bible had never been more real.

I know the promise of eternal life is guaranteed.

I know I'll see Julie again one day,

and at her funeral, I didn't know back then,

the Holy Spirit speaks to you but He does.

It's our thoughts a lot of times but it's really

God speaking to us.

I'll never forget, God put it in my heart.

She was ready to be with me.

She's with me.

Everyone else here, that does not know me,

they still have time to make a choice,

because we have time while we have breath,

to choose Jesus or to not, it's our choice.

But once we take that last breath,

there's no more choices.

It's either for God or against Him.

She changed my life and that became my passion,

is Lord let me use softball as a tool and a vehicle

and now I know why I came to University of Arizona.

Amen sister!

Jake? [crowd laughs]

You're up!

I just really quickly want to hit on something

that she said.

It says in scripture that God has decided

to make His appeal through us.

That Jesus walked this Earth but He's no longer with us.

He said in fact that it'll be better for Him to leave

than to leave us with the Holy Spirit,

so that we can, so that He can make His appeal through us.

Hearing that about your friend,

she noticed something in her friend because of the way

that she was living her life.

Not because of the things that she was saying to people,

not because she was saying I'm a Christian, like she said,

and going and doing other things.

She was living her life in a way that made people,

teammates, just human beings see something different,

and see something that maybe they didn't have if they wanted

through the way that they lived.

If God says that He's decided for whatever reasons

to make His appeal through us as sinful human beings,

I think the best way to do that is to do what her friend did

and to live it out.

And to seek the Holy Spirit everyday in a way

that's going to influence you to love people

in a way that you couldn't without it.

I thought that was awesome, so thank you for sharing that.

I'm not sure I'm gonna follow it up.

It's easy for me to kind of separate,

my college experience from sport and kind of my life,

because they're completely separate.

I'd totally forget stuff if I try to do everything.

Baseball, I got there my freshman year.

Started pitching well right away.

I came in at the right time, there was a lot of turnover,

so a lot of guys had left,

they got drafted the year before I got there.

There was an opportunity for me to start

as their number three starter my freshman year.

Started on Sundays for us.

Had a really good season.

Loved it, loved college baseball.

I made a lot of new friends on the team obviously

and a lot new people at school.

Had a great year, that summer I made Team USA,

got to go travel with Team USA all over the place.

Went to Cuba and got to do bunch of stuff with them,

and sophomore year came back,

was our number one that year.

The other two starters had graduated or gotten drafted

so I was our number one.

Struggled, kind of had a rough year.

Again I wasn't a Christian at the time

so it was tough for me.

The people around me kind of had to deal with that.

The attitude and the frustrations

of not doing well in your sport.

Tends to come down on the people that are in your life.

Again came back, went home that summer,

put on some weight, got a long stronger,

came back my junior year,

got moved to the bullpen as a closer.

Had a really good year as a closer and then like I said,

got drafted in the fifth round by the Minnesota Twins.

Just had a really good baseball experience at Oregon.

And as far as everything else,

I went to college just ready to just soak it in.

Ready to make the most of it in every way,

and in ways that I probably shouldn't have.

I was just excited to party,

I was excited to meet new people, and meet girls,

and just do all these things

that you think back then at that time are super important.

So with that in mind, I ended up meeting this girl

my freshman year.

There was just something really different about her.

I was just very,

she was like a magnet.

I was very attracted to just who she was as a person,

as a friend, the way she treated other people.

We started developing a friendship and just hanging out

a lot and just doing little things together.

It was really cool because we were just two freshman.

Our parents didn't have a ton of money,

so we were just finding ways to hang out

and spend time with each other,

and not spending a bunch of money.

Not going on these dates or anything but we were just

developing a friendship.

I found out that she was a Christian,

I liked that, that was attractive to me.

I was a bad boy and she was a good girl.

You know I liked that.

We would walk to church together on Sundays sometimes

and I wasn't doing it for the right reasons,

but I enjoyed it.

I enjoyed spending time with her so she was gonna take me

to church and we were gonna do that together.

I was gonna go with her.

We would do that, we would do other things.

Just the person that I was,

unfortunately I pulled her in my direction,

in my lifestyle, the way that I wanted to do things,

you know, spend the night with me.

I noticed is the way you grew up but my ways a lot more fun

so come into my life.

We really really saw how that just ruined our friendship

and our relationship because what I see now

is the importance of the male leadership in a relationship.

If that's not there, that relationship is going to suffer.

Especially if Christ is not in the center.

There's a difference between being a male leader

and being a male leader who fears God.

And so when Christ isn't the center in your relationship

whether it's a girlfriend, or a fiance, or even in marriage,

it's going to suffer.

So freshman year we spent time getting to know each other,

and developing a friendship

and kind of towards the end of the year,

things kind of started going my way,

and it got really rough because of that.

We fought all the time.

You know sin really breeds these things.

It breeds insecurities, it breeds anger,

and so many other issues.

I didn't see it at the time but that lack of leadership

and not having Christ in the center of our relationship

ruined a really really precious thing.

By her junior year, that summer going into junior year,

we had broken up.

It was really because I wasn't ready to be

in that kind of relationship and like I said,

we kind of squandered a really good thing

because of the way that we were living our lives.

In that aspect, that point of my life was really rough.

It was fun at the time but looking back now,

I see that the decisions that I made in my relationship

and in relationships with other people in colleges,

is just not being a God fearing Christ loving man,

really ruined a lot of really good things in my life,

that you think at the time are a lot of fun.

But at that time I was so happy with baseball

and thinking that was really everything.

Getting drafted and seeing that money

finally go into your bank account,

when you don't grow up with it and then all of a sudden

you have a lot of it.

I had really thought at that moment of my life,

what could be any better?

I didn't feel like anything was missing.

I didn't feel any need for Christ.

I didn't feel Him calling for me.

I thought I had everything that I needed in sports

and in the other things that were fulfilling me at the time.

So like I said when I was in high school,

my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer and so,

going into, so, when she got sick,

she had a double mastectomy and basically like, tubes,

this is kind of graphic but so you guys get the idea.

She had tubes out of the side of her.

She couldn't take a shower by herself.

She couldn't raise her hand, she couldn't do a lot of things

so my dad had to work.

I had to take care of her before I left for college.

So we pretty much did everything together,

doctors appointments, showers together.

Then I had to leave for college, like I said,

I wanted to go somewhere far enough to get away

but I didn't want to stay too close.

So I went to college at University of Oregon

and it was hard for me.

I was away from my mom who was sick.

I was struggling between, I knew who God was, like I said.

Why would God do this to my mom?

Why would you do this to my mom?

My mom had given her life to Christ I want to say,

four or five years before,

she was diagnosed with breast cancer.

She was on that path, that personal relationship.

Like I said, she was raised Catholic but she had given

her life over to Christ.

She always assured me like, you know, Nikki,

God's got a plan, I'm okay, I'm strong,

I can get through this.

And I'm like, dude, I don't know how

we're gonna get through this.

What happens now mom, like, where are you gonna go?

And so every little piece or time or moment

that I could spend with my mom, I would do it.

When I got to college freshman year,

I was really struggling with just my identity

and all the expectations people have put on me

and wanting to be there for my mom.

Should I go home?

My mom's struggling, or I'm struggling at softball,

I'm supposed to be this, or I'm supposed to be this

All-American that people are telling me, right?

I was suffocating myself because I like to checklist,

I like to do a few things, I got that done, I got that done,

and I got that done.

But I couldn't do that with my life.

I couldn't control every aspect of my life

and that really really bothered me.

I went home freshman year,

my mom was still sending me those cards like,

scripture and God loves you, He's got a plan for you,

and keep fighting, she's still going through all this.

She had another surgery my sophomore year of college

and I was really battling the expectations.

I didn't do bad my freshman year of college.

I mean if you do good, everyone's like, wow, she's awesome.

If you do bad, it's kind of okay, you'd expect it.

I did all right freshman year

and then going into my sophomore year,

I was really struggling because I was starting to like

want to follow God and want to live my life

kinda how I see my mom has something to rely on.

But then I was like I don't really know

if I want to commit to that.

That's kind of a lot to commit to.

My mom had invited to Women of Faith conference.

I wasn't doing anything.

It was during Christmas break I want to say.

She was like, let's go and I was like, hmm.

And she's like, no come on, it'll be good.

So I ended up going with her and I was sitting through it.

Like I said God was kind of tugging on my heart,

to follow Him or have that relationship with Him.

I ended up giving my life to Christ that day.

It was my sophomore year of college.

In no way was I walking and living it out through softball.

I think I completely isolated the two factors.

When I went back my junior year, I was really,

trying and wanting to but like I said,

struggling with that, okay, I don't want to tell people

'cause then they expect certain things from me.

I was struggling with just releasing that pressure.

Like I could play free and people are talking about

you play free if you play for Jesus

and I'm like, I want that.

I want to be free.

All these people have all these expectations

but how do I get there?

How do I do this?

I struggled with identity like I said,

every morning I'd wake up just praying God,

God please just do something.

I don't what it is but please just do something.

My junior year ended up being one of my better years.

I can say this honestly,

no way did I live out my life for Christ on the field

towards like my teammates or just myself.

I didn't treat myself well with the things

that I said to myself,

or if I did bad, kind of like Aubree said,

it was like got to feel that I did bad.

Oh I did bad so you're gonna have a bad day.

You're gonna know I had a bad day.

But I was a Christian, right?

I had given my life to Christ but I didn't know how to

put the two together.

I had struggled for so long with identity.

I got to my junior year and I became an All-American.

So it was like, wow, okay my dad's happy.

My coaches are happy, like this is cool.

And then I was like,

what have I wanted all along?

I made everyone else happy,

I checked it off for everyone else, like I did it.

So what now, and I'm like, okay, well I just started

this relationship and kind of going to God for more than

just my mom's sick, I was going to God everyday,

kind of getting in there, but I could never connect the dots

so my senior year came around,

I'm a little bit of a better teammate,

and trying to figure out how to play for God

but still be competitive.

Not lose that competitive edge.

I would slip up sometimes.

I had to leave the team in prayer.

It affected my relationship with God because I wanted to

live my life out and show people like Jesus loves you,

this, that, and the other, but on the other side of it,

I couldn't follow through and I couldn't fully commit

to connecting them or living out my life

in a Christ-like manner.

I struggled with that junior and senior year

and some of my better years because I had fulfilled

all these expectations but they were my better years

because I was able to play free because I had something else

that I was relying on.

I was looking forward to those days when I went home

and I could just pray to God or prayed to my best friend,

'cause God became my best friend at that point where

no one else knew what I was saying to Him.

It was just me and Him.

That was the most powerful thing I had ever experienced

'cause my life became about Him and then my senor year

came around I thought softball was going to be over.

Can I go this one?

Okay, so I thought softball was gonna be over.

Then I was in the grad program, I was like, that's it.

I'm done with softball.

I did everything all you people wanted me to do

and I'm moving on.

I was trying to really connect the dots

and I got into a masters program at Oregon.

Then Janie Takeda, she's like the common,

oh Reed, sorry!

Janie Takeda Reed, my bad.

[crowd laughs]

Sorry!

She's like the common factor between us all.

She ended up getting a job at Oklahoma for volunteer coach

so that meant she had to leave Biola.

Well, Biola came popping up, popping up, popping up.

I was like, oh my gosh, softball's not over for me.

I'm going to have to, you know, coach.

I was like, coach, that's so crazy!

I ended up taking a leap of faith.

I was in grad program doing what I wanted to do,

and I ended up taking a leap of faith

and coming to Biola.

It wasn't until I stepped foot on this campus,

with these girls that I began to understand,

how to combine those two and how to play for Him.

How to really walk right where I'm not ashamed to say

I made these mistakes.

I want to tell you not to make these mistakes.

I don't want you to be ashamed of not walking the right way

or struggling between wanting to play for him

but then still slipping up sometimes.

It's okay to have those struggles.

I got here and like I said I began to understand

how to put those two together and then,

God was like, here's a USA invitation.

I'm not only gonna coach now,

I'm gonna try out for the USA team.

So I started preparing for that and while I was there,

I just had this, I just came to realization,

my faith was growing while I was at Biola, why I got here.

While I was at the USA tryout, I was like, man,

if I don't make this team, I know in my heart,

for the first time in my life,

I got a second chance, to come out here,

and to show everyone who I competed against my whole life

or who were my teammates who I treated so badly,

that I'm walking for Jesus now and playing for Jesus

in my actions and the way I handle my failures,

and the way that I carry myself.

Even my words that I speak,

the tone that I speak to people now,

it blew my mind that I was given a second opportunity.

Just a little piece, just taking that pressure off of you,

I had the worst, like terrible tryout.

It was not very good, like at all.

I was not expecting to play so you can only imagine

you're going up against the best of the best,

and not preparing and God just places us out in your heart

but He was so faithful and I ended up making the team,

Japan All-Star's Series team

and so I ended up making the team and I truly believe

in my heart it is a second chance and opportunity

to go out there and express and just put claim to gospel,

and my relationship with Jesus has come and how to,

if people are struggling with wanting to identify

as Christian and implementing into their life

and implementing it into softball.

That's so good.

So so good and I think it teaches that devil is so alive

and so well and he knows when you're most vulnerable.

He knows where to attack and how to attack.

So thankful that He is faithful.

You can see his fingerprints along the way.

He uses those seeds and His people around you.

Through each step of my life too, there was always,

God played somebody and I always had somebody with me.

Going back to my first week of college was horrible.

My grandfather just passed away.

It was like the first death that really hit me hard.

My mom was supposed to drive out with me to Arizona,

to move into my apartment.

There was two sophomores that I played travel ball with

and they convinced me not to do the dorm life.

It's way cooler if you have your own apartment.

So I was like sweet, well, freshman year you have to go,

a week before everybody else.

They're still at home and I'm here checking into my new

apartment all by myself.

We have no furniture, I know nobody.

I was the only freshman on the softball team.

So it was like where am I and what is this?

My boyfriend from my senior year,

he was going to Baylor to play baseball.

So literally my dad flew home.

We went to the funeral, flew home,

we packed up my car, my boyfriend came picked us up,

we drove to Arizona, and then he drove onto Baylor.

I remember sleeping in this apartment like,

I'm not a fan of being by myself.

Here I was in my first apartment ever,

with a sleeping bag on the floor, like, just praying,

first of all, so broken hearted over my grandfather,

my parents aren't even there with me,

this is freshman orientation.

I have nobody around me,

I just remember like, God,

what in the world had I gotten into, what is this?

It was a little hard, lonely week,

but thankfully I got through it.

It's just hard I think being away from everything

that you know.

You are so vulnerable to everything around you.

There is a lot of pressure.

Your schedule's crazy, there's so much going on.

It was a lot but I think the devil just makes it busy

and literally I'm so consumed to trying to be

the best softball player I could be,

and make the grades to play softball and all of these things

where it's like you don't even have an extra 10 minutes

to breathe really, your whole day is scheduled out for you

so just kind of like going through the motions everyday.

It was a lot harder than I thought.

Here I went to Arizona and I thought,

best of the best, best coaches, best team,

we're gonna win a couple national championships.

I remember my sophomore year, I was just like okay,

this is too much.

And then my junior year, it was like okay God,

this season is for you.

I'm gonna surrender my all to you.

I just started this little pre thing before every single

page I recited Philippians 4:13.

I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me.

So I started saying that every pitch.

It was just like my way of like, 'cause otherwise,

the devil and fear and doubt, I swear he knows how to attack

and it doesn't matter.

I would watch a video, right?

We hear you're in college,

you have all these extra things to help you.

I remember sitting in the video room,

and watching all of these talented athletes hit

and I would get out there and be like,

she can hit so hard.

She is so good, don't you dare throw her that pitch.

And I was like, wait this whole video thing

is not working for me, like at all.

Not one bit because all I'm thinking about

is how good she is.

You live, right?

You live and learn and thank God,

at junior year it was like, hey God, it's you, it's not me,

and I can do everything that I can to prepare

but ultimately I'm gonna throw this pitch

and I have to live with your will

and you're gonna hold me through it,

and you're gonna be there no matter what.

That was my undefeated season and I just remember,

there was a lot of pressure.

Going into it, and going back, kind of ironic enough,

I was trying to write my book, Throw Like a Girl,

and this was way after college.

I was asking my parents and Leah,

I don't have a good memory.

So I was trying to get stories.

My parents can remember everything and so my parents

were bringing up these stories and my dad was like,

hey do you remember that loss to ASU?

And I was like no dad.

Or do you remember it, and I said, of course dad,

and you would be the one to bring that up, you know?

So we were on our way of sophomore year

and it was like hey freshman year you felt short,

sophomore year was like I want to earn being in that circle.

I want to earn the ball in my hand.

I want my teammates, I want my coach

to want me in that circle.

This was my mission sophomore year.

I'm doing everything I can to be there while I fell short.

We had to beat ASU I think last eight years in a row.

We had a 38 game winning streak against them.

That was a big in state rivalry, ASU, Arizona.

It came down to last inning.

One pitch, threw a fat rise ball, home run over the fence.

That was it and it was like, well one pitch,

and now 38 games, eight years,

the tradition of Arizona softball,

I just let everybody down.

Just feeling probably my lowest of low.

Well my dad tells me, he was like.

"Do you know that lost to ASU was the

" beginning of your 60 game consecutive winning streak?"

And I was like "What?"

First of all, I don't know how I didn't remember that

or ever go back to that game

but what I'm so thankful for God planting that.

For him to tell me too

because now I can go around

and say that was probably

one of my lowest of lows in college

but yet the next game was one of the highest of highs

and a record that still stands.

That's crazy.

Only by God.

We never know what God has in store but we gotta show up.

We got to be faithful.

We got to be there.

We have to say yes.

I think just this year he's really putting in my heart,

it's not enough to just pray and to want,

but he's like okay move out in faith.

You got to do it.

I was just watching something this week

and it was like God gave us a tree.

He didn't give us tables and chairs,

he gave us a tree

and then we created the tables and chairs

and they're just like, wow okay God.

I'm going to start making those moves.

Be bolder and start doing the do.

It's not enough to just believe and feel

and hope and want and pray

but okay I'm gonna do.

Going back that was my junior year.

I just remember so much pressure.

This undefeated season

and he would make the national championship game

and I can honestly say there's no way

that I would be able to get through that without God.

I knew that I did get that point was it wasn't him.

I knew no matter if we lost,

yeah it was gonna hurt, it was gonna burn

but I was okay and I was going to be okay

because it's not about this victory

or this picture, who I am on the softball field,

it's bigger than that.

God's gonna use it.

That was awesome year.

We ended up winning the national championship

and that goes back to

our catcher who was awesome.

She hit a home run.

I was the pitcher.

I ended up getting the MVP

but if you would have asked any of us

who was the most valuable player on our team,

it was a girl named Teresa Ive.

And Teresa Ive probably pitched

maybe five innings her whole senior year.

But she shined for Christ in everything that she did,

every single day.

Every single day she came out with just

a passion and heart only for God

and each other.

Every single time you look at her

she was with a big smile on her face,

and she had everything in the world to be upset about.

Not playing, all the things the world says

that a success and that's what you want to be.

Well, she didn't have those things according to softball

and Arizona, that's a big deal just like all of us,

where ever we went there's a lot of pressure as well

and that kind of becomes what your identity is

and who you're suppose to be.

It was so much bigger.

I know that God,

we are never even gonna see on this side

how many seeds she planted

and I'm so thankful for the light that she was.

What an amazing testimony that is.

I feel like the world says you need a gold medal

or you need to be on Team USA

or you need to be an All-American,

but no God can ...

Look at the Bible.

God used the broken, the abused,

people who couldn't speak eloquently

and with God we can do all things.

I think especially in this world of comparison

and social media and stuff that's not real

we always think about what we don't have

and who we aren't.

It's like no.

This last month something came up with my son

and how amazing it was to go back.

Sorry.

To the word and be like with my 11 year old now.

This is the what God says about it

and that's were we need to be

and were I need to be even

because every single day we're being fed

this stuff that is not real,

is not true, is not eternal

and how important it is to surround yourself

with those that do believe.

That do know what God says about you

and who you are and who we are in Christ

and where we're all gonna be one day

and the hope that he brings us each and every day.

Awesome.

Last thing and I know we're over time

but could you just tell us quickly what,

if that's possible,

how God has used this sport

and your faith and what has happened since then

and what you're doing with it now?

For me, kind of going with the USA thing,

that was my biggest dream

and then it was gone after '08.

Now it's been reignited and it's so cool

and after my first summer with USA

Janie and other one of our teammates, Michelle,

had started a bible study and I started going.

Then after that summer again I get invited

and then I wanted to play again

and then immediately when the list came out.

I saw my name and then Janie, Ali and Michelle.

Where are my sisters?

Did they make it too.

Because I wanted that community.

I wanted that bible study that had become

my favorite part of the summer.

This thing that I had been striving for my whole life,

yeah it's an honor to wear USA

but my favorite part of being on Team USA

is our bible study.

The way we use it.

For me being able to be a part of Church on the Dirt now

and using that platform has become ...

The feeling of being on fire for God

is overwhelming and it just brings so much joy

and so much passion

and the kind of friendships and relationships

that are so much deeper than this world.

It's been so cool for me to not only experience

playing for him and being able to play freely

and just experience joy in different way.

But now through Church on the Dirt

and what we're doing with that

and watching that the way God is working

in Church on the Dirt is unbelievable.

I can't even wrap my mind around it.

All the updates that we're getting.

Being a part of that and that ministry

is something that I never expected.

Especially, I was the kid who

never would have imagined speaking publicly

or about anything, let alone the gospel

and having the confidence to do that

and that's only by the Holy Spirit.

I was a super shy kid.

I never wanted to try something new.

I cried when my mom signed me up for softball.

I cried over everything.

I didn't want to ever put myself out there.

I just think working with Church on the Dirt

has not only strengthened my own faith

but given me the opportunity to use my platform

that God blessed me with.

He gave me the talents to get where I am

and He's given me this platform

and He's given me these opportunities.

I just think recognizing your opportunities

as for what they are.

As not only,

as opportunities to glorify God

in anything that you're doing.

Whether you fail, whether you succeed.

I tell kids a lot in recruiting

you always have something to show a coach.

Because they're all freaking out about recruiting

but the same thing, you always have a way

to glorify God.

If you fail, if you succeed,

there's always a way for you to be a light.

That's been so rewarding to see that

and work on that and see that in my teammates.

This last summer the coolest moment

of this little prayer train

in the middle of a game against Japan

in the championship of the World Cup.

Were Michelle needs prayer

and then Ali wanted prayer

and all these little conversation

and then I've been playing so terrible.

I could not hit

and Janie right before I go up to bat,

she's like hey Aubree.

I'm like what?

I'm thinking she's gonna be like,

hey yeah just throw in a drop ball

or this or that, thinking she's giving me hitting advice

and she goes like hey what can I pray for you?

I was stunned because my mind was thinking about what throws

and me being normally long-winded,

as you can probably tell,

I was able to say, " A calm heart and clear eyes."

Like that.

And she was like okay I got it

and she goes back and she tells Ali

and she tells Michelle hey pray for Aubree.

Calm heart and clear eyes.

I got a hit which was cool

but it was so not the point.

I just felt so at peace in the box

and so seeing that come to...

Just having those opportunities,

having that community,

having those sisters in Christ,

just the freedom that comes with that is so cool.

I mean all of you have played sports,

whether it's softball, baseball.

Anything in your life you're passionate about.

Being able to use Christ

to not only play with freedom

and have him dwell in you

and the Holy Spirit dwell in you is so powerful.

In turn show that to other people

and help grow his kingdom.

I want that for all you guys.

Awesome.

It's exciting to see I think the boldness of these girls

and I was able to meet with a group of them

as they're having bible study.

I know it pumps me up just to see

that God's continuing through sports

to get a little remanence and people.

I think the more boldness

and what happens is the more people around you

it gives you more boldness.

We're not alone.

For me as I in college wanted to know the Lord.

He started to give me a heart to just closer to Him.

To learn to play for Him.

I made the USA Team and continued on that.

As I was finishing my career in 2004 at my last Olympics.

You know I'm a pretty passionate person

and when I'm at field I play,

I wear my emotions on my sleeve.

Usually see a big smile.

God started to take the passion at the end of my career.

I was a mom.

I had my son who turned three

when we were finishing up career and I kind of knew.

I could feel literally this pull of

this is the end of the road for softball.

I had had my son

and some people where oh she might be done

but I knew I wasn't done yet

unless God closed that door at tryout.

I made the team.

All of a sudden this other passion

started coming in to speak about God

and I was like I can't do that God.

No, I can't.

My teammate she is so funny

and she is so smart.

Everybody else could do this.

Kind of like Moses, he's like I can't do it.

I just remember God just making it very clear

that this was not my doing

because I wouldn't chose that for myself.

I didn't think I could anyways.

I remember it being very clear this passion

was being put there for him.

I literally said, "Okay God.

"Okay, I'll go where you want me to go

"but you better show up.

"You better show me what to speak on.

"The Holy Spirit better be present.

"And you have to open the doors.

"You have to do it

"but I am willing.

"I will go where you want me to go.

"Wherever you put me."

After that began a process.

First of all, this crazy desire to speak

but God not opening doors yet.

God taught me during that time.

I was like either take it away

or give it to me now.

God said sometimes I ask you guys to wait.

I'm going to teach you while I'm preparing you.

I have something.

Some of you may have experienced that before.

Through that I learned the depth of prayer

and fellowship and the Bible.

Just getting deep into the Bible

not just certain verses here and there.

His truth.

Then eventually God started to open doors.

Fellowship of Christian Athletes have spoken a lot.

Athletes in Action.

Jennie Finch's camps eventually.

We do Bible studies on Sunday morning prior to camp

and I'm telling you the coolest thing

to have sometimes hundreds of families

before we start softball camp,

listening to the word of God.

I spoke at this one event for

Fellowship of Christian Athletes.

They said in 53 years of this event,

you're the first female speaker we've ever had.

Different things.

I was a television host for a Christian sport show

on TBN for a few years with A.C. Green from the Lakers

and Frank Pastore who has since passed away

but I'm like what I'm I doing here.

What am I doing here?

I was like but you brought me here

so I'll just go and God you better show up.

Literally He is faithful.

College campuses.

It's all God.

Here's what I say to you.

Every single year I'm like Lord it's your schedule to fill.

Make it work.

I'm a mom with three boys.

I homeschool.

It has to make sense with my family.

God is faithful.

It doesn't mean I have not had hard times.

It does not mean that I haven't had attacks

that have come in between my family

because I'm about to go out

and share the word of God somewhere

and yet the enemy is trying to get in family

so I can get discouraged

and say, how can I go talk over here when

this seems like it's falling apart.

But God is faithful.

You battle.

I see those attacks.

I claim God's promises and the word

and I say, God you will see us through this

and we will have victory cause Jesus you are victory.

I just say to all of you,

everyone of you in here no matter what age we are,

cause God is never done with us.

Maybe all of you are doing this , awesome,

but just God I'm yours.

I'm yours.

Take me where you want me to go.

Tell me what you want me to do.

Again, he may take you where you never though.

Again, I didn't want to speak.

You said you didn't want to speak.

Now you can't shut us up.

[laughing]

Just say God I'm yours.

I tell you what,

your life will never be the same.

You will be so happy you made that choice.

That's awesome again.

I feel like these girls really have softball covered.

I'm not a softball player.

[audience laughing]

I feel like they really got sports covered.

I wasn't originally suppose to be here.

We got word from some of the male coaches

of the sports here that aren't here unfortunately

but brought it to Lorie's attention for me to be here.

To get kind of a male perspective,

which I though was a great idea.

To get the opportunity to be here speaking.

Sports are great but I'm so much more than a baseball player

and they're so much more than a softball player.

I feel like I was brought here to talk about

something much different.

I'm not going just let that go to waste

because again this is a blessing from God

for me to be here.

I leave Monday for spring training.

My wife is with Oklahoma now

with their softball team.

They're opening this season so I'd love to be

there with her but I'm here

and I have an opportunity.

There's some men and some guys in the audience

that I really feel like I was brought here to speak to.

Sports are great.

Baseball's going well.

For me kind of going back to that relationship

and understanding our roles are males.

It is so crucial if this is a relationship

that you want to work

and that you see a future with,

that you start to take ownership for your faith seriously.

That is becomes the priority in your relationship.

That if somebody from the outside is looking

at your relationship can tell.

Not in a legalistic way at all.

I fear it can go that way if I don't bring this up

but I just think in my life,

what my decisions in the way I want to live my life

and the things I cut out of my life when I need to.

What they where motivated by

and this just alludes to our faith.

It's motivated by the gospel.

It's motivated by the cross.

By what Christ has already done.

It's not motivated to gain merit with God

because we never will.

It's not motivated by works.

It's not motivated by anything

but what Christ has done in our lives.

I just think about that picture of Jesus

in the garden before he's betrayed to be crucified.

He's staring at the cup of wrath in front of him

and saying, daddy I don't want to do this.

I can't do this but if it's your will I'll do it.

Jesus loved us that much to go through that

on the cross for us.

For me those life changing things in your relationship,

in your life as a man need to be motivated by the gospel.

Need to be motivated by what Christ has done.

Not by earning favor.

Not by trying to please your girlfriend

or trying to please your fiancee

or trying to please your wife

but solely living your life

because of what Christ has done.

Resting in that truth

and letting it change your life.

If you do that, if you begin to pray

and you being to ask God

what you're doing wrong in your relationship

because chances are that you are doing things wrong.

You're doing things that maybe you shouldn't be doing

that aren't honoring God

that you know you shouldn't be doing in a relationship.

It is your job as a male to ask God what am I doing

and help me get rid of this

so I can lead my girlfriend.

So I can lead my fiancee.

So I can lead my wife in the way that you

want me to lead her.

Not in the way that I want to do things

and again not to please you,

not to earn merit with you

but because of what you've done for me

I want to live me life and follow you

and honor you in my relationship.

I challenge you guys in the audience today to,

if you are making those mistakes.

If you're in a situation with your girlfriend

were you don't need to be there

and you guys know what I'm talking about

and you girls know as well.

I challenge you to pray.

I challenge you to ask God to reveal that to you

and most importantly I challenge you

to pray to ask God to remove it to you,

so that you can experience the relationship

that God has set for you before you were even born.

There is a relationship waiting for you.

There are things waiting for you

in marriage that are worth waiting for

and not sacrificing because the truth is

when you give these things away

before God says that you're ready to,

you're giving a piece of your soul away.

You're giving a piece of your body away.

That you'll never get back

and we're forgiven and we're cleansed by the blood of Christ

and I've made those mistakes as well

but the best decision that my wife and I made

was committing to living a life

worthy of our calling.

Committing to a relationship that was going to honor him

before we got married.

Now we get to experience the fruits of marriage

in that relationship that God offers us

and wants us to have once we're married.

I'm sorry I like baseball.

I'm still playing.

It's going great.

[audience laughing]

You guys be the man in your relationship.

Be the man in your house.

Be the men that your woman,

your lady needs you to be.

Because she does need you

and she needs you to lead the relationship

and when you're not you will see how it suffers.

When you do you will see the fruits of it.

Like I said God placed me at Biola

and gave me a second chance to

go to the USA tryout.

Just play for him and learn how to play for him.

It was probably a really terrible tryout for me.

I can't even count the times I struck out

but every time I struck out I found myself

running back to the dugout

and just trying to pick a conversation with someone

that I usually hold my breath

or not talk to someone for however many innings

it took me to get over that.

It was a second chance and this new opportunity.

When I got to Biola I came here

and not fully committed to God like I said.

A couple of pieces of my life that needed

to be cleaned up and I got here

and I was how am I going to sit

in front of all these of girls

and be their coach first of all.

And then not have my life ...

They're looking at me as a role-model

and I don't have my life cleaned up.

There's a lot of different aspects of my life

to be cleaned up but one in specifically,

kind of like Jake was talking about,

is just taking that step

and just fully giving it to God.

And saying, God I am all yours.

If this is not the relationship,

because I am fully walking in this way

and this is what I believe now

and my life is going to be completely,

me following you then so be it.

I look back now

and I had teammates who looked to me

and that they knew that I believed in God

and was trying to walk

but I was doing other things

that were not according to the word.

For me to go back now

and to be sitting up here,

I'm a very, I do not like sharing my business.

I'm sharing my whole life with you guys

so it's very hard for me and never in my life,

like Leah and Aubree talked about,

did I think I would be sitting up here

and sharing what I did wrong

or just personal parts of my life with people.

Here I am because God placed me here

and I decided to take that step

and get my life aligned

and truly follow the word by what it says

and what I truly believe in my heart is right now.

I used to look at people

and say no way that's crazy.

I can't do that.

How can I give that up?

Now I'm fully sitting here

saying that this is 100% what I believe in now

because God has transformed my heart

and transformed the way that I see this world.

I'm no longer of this world.

It's just crazy because you might be sitting there,

like that's way far.

I could never see myself getting there

but I truly believe and I think that

if you get to this point

and it's not easy.

It's not a quick fix.

It was a struggle.

A daily commitment to say God I put you first.

When I'm in those situations, God I put you first.

We're not going to do this.

It's a daily surrender.

I'm still learning.

Like Aubree said, never did I think I'd sit up here

and then I got to Biola

and God had placed this on Janie and Lorie's heart

to do Church on the Dirt.

They're like we want you to be a part of the panel.

I was a little discouraged

because one I knew that they had followed Christ

and they were all great teammates

and I was not a good teammate.

So I'm like how am I going to sit up here

and talk about this.

Or they're all part of Team USA

but that point I hadn't been part of Team USA

so it was a little discouraging.

Like I said, God will use the broken people

and never think that anything you went through was in vain.

Never did I think my mistakes

and the crazy decisions I decided to make

would have led me here at Biola

for God to work wonders in my life

and speak to you guys.

Just speak to the people who have

known me before I had this transformation

and how I am now.

To get to go out into the softball world

where people know me as Nikki Udria

who does this, that or the other.

Now just proclaim my relationship with Jesus

and how to walk on that with Jesus.

So, so good.

I think I'm just amazed.

I think just with the opportunity

and how I fear faithful God's gonna use you.

If you say yes God will open that door.

I'm so thankful for just the confirmation.

Not that I need the confirmation

but he knows just when you're at your wit's end

and you just need that little extra something.

He'll supply it and he'll find it for you.

If you remain steadfast.

If you remain faithful.

I you just keep walking.

Even though it's not pretty.

Like they were saying I dropped out

of public speaking in college

because I was like heck no.

I have to speak in front of the class?

I'm out of here.

No chance.

Then here we go.

Okay God, what?

No.

They want you to come speak.

I was like "Me?"

No they do not want me to come speak.

I can promise you this.

Over and over, okay God.

Okay God I'll do it.

Alright, let's do this.

I just think He wants us out of our comfort zone.

We like to stay in our comfort zone.

I like to stay in my comfort zone.

I think can we fully be used there?

No.

There's no more.

There's a heavenly perspective.

Yes the big platform is great.

I've had it too

but I think too just the last season

God really put in my heart.

Just with my three boys here I was coaching

6u travel baseball.

These little boys, I knew that I could be Jesus.

I could share with them the love of Jesus

and the love of Christ.

The big numbers and the followers are great

and all of that but it's those personal relationship.

The people that you have sleeping under your roof.

That's where you need to be

and where God wants you to be.

He'll take care of the rest for sure.

I think just those little steps.

Little steps not anything big.

For sure I never even imagined anything just crazy.

Okay God, for real?

For real?

Okay, alright let's do this.

I fall short every single day

and I'm so thankful for the blood of Christ

and for his forgiveness.

As everyone has said up here,

he transforms you.

We need to be in his word for that ...

Like I said we're being fed daily.

But no no no, what does God say?

What's the eternal perspective?

Remember listening to this,

we just talked about this today, this radio interview.

These two missionaries

and here they where in the Middle East.

It was a husband speaking

and his wife is there also.

The radio guy was like

did you ever think about what could happen to you

if you were caught?

Here we complain if church goes

longer than an hour and a half, right?

But there they're so hungry for it.

They're meeting and putting their lives on the line

just to hear the word of God.

God please forgive me first of all

because it's so easy here

and yet we still make it difficult.

I'll never forget what he said

and he said just think about what your wife

could be put through.

Pretty much physical torture.

Both of them

and every single day they're living this risky life

but it's where God wants them.

And they're remaining faithful.

He said, "You know our answer to that is

"we can deal with whatever he brings on this side

"because we know eternity is waiting."

And I think too so often it's the short term.

It's like no, eternity is forever.

Those things seem hard

and yeah they do seem hard even to me as a believer.

Daily but it's eternity that's waiting

and it's worth it.

It is worth it.

He's worth it.

You're worth it.

Amen.

So we are currently out of time obviously.

We want to thank you

and I just encourage you.

If you are a parent in the room

or a parent that's listening,

our kids need Jesus.

We have a whole generation that we have gone away

and sports is really taking the forefront

of a lot of our lives

but we cannot leave him at home.

We have got to find a way to bring him back

into our homes and back into our lives

and to raise our children based

on our biblical principals.

We must go back to those original

God's plan for all of our lives.

It falls a lot of times on us parents.

I challenge us as parents, as teammates,

as even those with platforms

that we would take a stand in this dark world

and that we would share the light

and the love of Jesus Christ.

Because this is our mission.

This is what we are here for

and just like Jennie says,

"There is something greater coming."

Here we are.

We are in front of you today testifying

that this isn't all that their is.

[upbeat music]

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